My Birthday Gift

This morning during my meditation I set the intention to have a really good day and feel happy. Not that I don’t wish that on every day but today was my birthday and aren’t we suppose to be happy on our birthday? Lately I’ve been noticing I’ve been in a medium state, not too happy but not sad either- just medium. I guess it’s better than the ups and downs of the roller coaster ride that was my life.

I’m not sure if I like this medium state though. I think it’s kind of blah. What begins to worry me is that I might slip back into the numbness I lived in my whole life, and to me there’s nothing worse than to not feel.

So I set my intention for the day and off I went into busy mode, getting ready for my mini getaway that I planned after teaching my yoga class. As I was busy getting things together I was noticing that I was starting to get stressed over not having enough time to get everything done. This was not bringing me closer to being in a “happy state” and that annoyed me more. It’s my birthday I’m thinking, I’m suppose to be happy, not aggravated.

By the time I rushed around and got in the car, already late leaving, I was definitely not feeling happy. I turned on the radio to a soft song, nothing that really moved me, but I took a deep breath and as I was exhaling I felt my heart chakra open and warm tingly energy start to build then radiate out from my heart. I allowed the feeling to take over my body and sighed in relief as I thanked God for this gift. I can feel again! I’m alive! I was overcome in emotion and gratitude as I bathed in the sensation of love and light within me and all around me.

It was a total feeling of bliss, feeling the connectedness to All That Is in the moment. I’m not a numb robot anymore!

It lasted only a couple of minutes, but it was enough for me. I walked into the yoga studio beaming and shared my experience with my class. The feedback I received was how it was hard to attain that state of bliss. Yes I agreed with them. Not only is it challenging to attain, but it’s even more challenging to maintain. But it’s possible.

First you must have the desire. Desire is the fuel that starts to draw it closer. Then you must set the intention and ask for it. Thirdly, be open to receiving without blocking it with doubt and negative mind chatter that self sabotages you and lastly, continue to plant the seeds and water your spiritual garden with your yoga practice, meditation, contemplation, journaling, singing, dancing, whatever brings your heart the most joy. Stay in the confident knowing that it is done.

What I learned is that happiness is a choice. We must practice being happy, it is a muscle that needs to be worked. I don’t think most people walk around happy all the time. That is unrealistic. But you can feel content and practice acceptance with whatever comes up for you. You don’t necessarily have to be ecstatic in joy, jumping around, just be at peace and content. Those are the seeds that bring the joy. In yoga philosophy we call this Santosha. Santosha or contentment starts with acceptance. Without acceptance there is resistance and resistance blocks the light.

The light is who you are. Everything else you’ve added on. Peel back the layers and feel the sunshine in your own heart. Reveal your beautiful light and feel into the love of your truest essence. It’s there. Right now rub your palms together and feel the energy in your hands, cross your hands over your heart center and take a deep breathe into your heart. Relax your mind and quiet your thoughts. Allow the love energy within you to come forth, Breath and know that you are beautiful, you are powerful, you are creator, and you are love. Namaste.